I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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