i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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