Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
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