At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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