What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
false alarm. still invincible.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
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she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize