you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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