Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
