It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Just invented taco cereal.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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