Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize