He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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