i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
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