I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
