Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
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