I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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