I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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