I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
