i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize