so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
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I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
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I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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