my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
