Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
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