Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
