what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
