i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Randomize