I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Randomize
