we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
