i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize