So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
