finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize