is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
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