I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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