You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
So many bounce houses so little time
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Randomize