Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
