you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
