I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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