he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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