Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize