my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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