No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
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We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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