I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Sober January is a disaster.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
How does one acquire holy water?
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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