OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize