Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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