I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
