K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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