i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
The air was thick with penises
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Randomize
