I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I feel great
I just peed on a car
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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