He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
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Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
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