WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.