I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize
