No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize