Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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